Sunday, 23 August 2015

A prayer for Amah


I just finished an online meeting that lasted 5 hours.
I had a box of strawberries for dinner, so after all that i'm actually pretty hungry right now.

My grandmother was asleep on the couch in the living room, and she woke up cause she heard me coming down.
"What time are you leaving for class tomorrow? I'll cook you mee sua."
"6.30am ma"
"so early?"
"ya no need to cook for me ok"

So i figured that i should just eat now and skip breakfast later and save her the hassle in the morning.

She's 79 this year, or in the chinese culture she's actually 80 years old (they somehow skip the number 9).

She had benign paroxysmal postural vertigo (BPPV), even though its benign, the dizziness might be dangerous as she might fall. God knows what would happen if such a frail and tiny lady like her falls.
She's got arthritis.
She's got a stiff shoulder and...
she's been falling sick more often now.

I hate to accept that the grandma that i grew up with, who could do anything and everything for both my brother and i, is now old.
I'm not saying that being old is a bad thing, but i don't ever want her to slow down and eventually, it goes to a halt.

She sat up from a couch, waited for 2 seconds before getting up.
"go back to sleep please i'll just cook for myself stop getting up STOP"
She refused to. She insisted on cooking for me.
She won't listen, got up from the couch and then, she held my hand and said
"you don't know how to cook it right. Come, i'll teach you."

So here she is, at 2.30 in the morning, cooking me my bowl of mee sua.

if this isn't love, i don't know what love is anymore.

Dear God,

I thank you that I was born into this family, to be a granddaughter of this amazing person who i call amah. I pray that you keep her safe. Safe from harm, falls, and injuries. I pray that you keep her in good health, and that her shoulder pain would ease over time with physio, that her immune system is good enough to battle the colds and cough she gets all the time. I pray that people around her would be patient with her if she asked them too many questions. I pray that she can have all the happiness in the world. I pray that she lives long and healthy enough, till the day she gets to drink the cup of tea that i will offer her on my wedding and to carry her own great grandchildren. Keep her safe from harm and danger.

I should be home more often.